Venus Renegade - Part 1

The first in a series of essays about Venus retrograde from the POV of an activist and organizer

Writer/activist/Democrasexy founder Becky Bullard riffs on Botticelli’s “Birth of Venus.” Original photo by Taylor Prinsen. Collage by Becky B.

Anyone who knows me IRL has had to contend with me checking on “what Chani says” before making weekend plans, business decisions, or sometimes even so much as a sandwich. To the astrologically uninitiated… “Chani” (rhymes with Annie) is Chani Nicholas, star-chart reader to the stars (like, Oprah is a fan).

I check my day’s horoscope in the CHANI app immediately after turning off my alarm every morning — it’s one way I get centered in myself before going out and interacting with the world.

For the past few weeks, Chani has been highlighting the Venus retrograde that started March 1. When a planet is retrograde, it appears to slow down or move backward in the sky. In astrological practice, this is a time to review the areas of life that planet is said to govern. Venus rules the domains of femmes, queer folks, pleasure, beauty, art, love, unions, creativity, and the like.

This particular Venus retrograde is starting out in the sign of Aries, the fiery, impulsive initiator of the zodiac. Significantly, this same Venus retrograde took place exactly eight years ago. Remember what else was happening exactly eight years ago that we are getting a repeat of right now???

Yup, a certain someone was in the early weeks of their first presidency.

As an activist who is largely focused on protecting women and queer folks, I am taking the studious review that this Venus retrograde invites very seriously. I am looking back on what I was doing in 2017 — when I oriented my life toward activism for the very first time — and asking myself: what worked about my approach back then? What didn’t? What has changed for me over these past eight years? What lessons can I learn by studying the past that will make me more effective this go-round?

This “Venus Renegade” series of essays will explore these themes and questions throughout this current Venus retrograde. I’m calling the series “Venus Renegade” because as Venus spends 40 days traveling through the underworld, this is the perfect time for me (and you! if you want!) to explore our own shadows — our darker impulses, our rough edges, our forbidden desires, our fiery opinions, our taboo taking-up-of-space, our unconventional art.

I don’t consider myself a visual artist — writing is more my thing — but in the spirit of Venus retrograde I was inspired to create the collage I’ve included with this essay. It was gratifying to express myself via a form of communication that is unconventional for me, and to take what feels like a bit of a risk.

Aries, where this Venus retrograde is happening, is also my moon sign. This means impetuous Aries rules my physical body and compels me to take risks with it. So, naturally, I had to include a photo of myself in a state of undress.

As I explain the thought behind the elements of this collage, I’ll repeat the image here so you don’t have to scroll all the way back up:

I wanted to reference perhaps the most famous image of Venus from history: “The Birth of Venus” by Botticelli.

But where Botticelli’s Venus is peaceful against a bright sky and calm sea, her gaze slightly off to the side and docile, my Venus retrograde/renegade is darker, more confronting. She leans slightly forward, her eyes fixed on you, her mouth without the hint of a smile (is there instead a hint of disdain?), her pose more power than purity. If you look closely you will see that the frilly pink panties have a uterus and ovaries embroidered on them — hidden further underneath in red thread is the word MINE.

My shell is a nod to artist Roy Lichtenstein’s exploration and critique of the idealized feminine of the 1960’s with its comic book “Ben-Day” dots.

The dark clouds in the background are a reference to a formative character from my childhood — “The Nothing,” the ominous antagonist from the 1984 film The NeverEnding Story.

I know so many people are railing against Trump and Musk right now, for valid reason. But the more frightening enemy to me in this moment is more akin to The Nothing.

Consider this scene from The NeverEnding Story where G’mork, the terrifying wolf with glowing eyes, confronts our hero Atreyu:

G'mork: Foolish boy. Don't you know anything about Fantasia? It's the world of human fantasy. Every part, every creature of it, is a piece of the dreams and hopes of mankind. Therefore, it has no boundaries.

Atreyu: But why is Fantasia dying, then?

G'mork: Because people have begun to lose their hopes and forget their dreams. So the Nothing grows stronger.

Atreyu: What is the Nothing?

G'mork: It's the emptiness that's left. It's like a despair, destroying this world. And I have been trying to help it.

Atreyu: But why?

G'mork: Because people who have no hopes are easy to control; and whoever has the control... has the power!

It is the loss of hope that I fear more than anything, and so I see the cultivation of hope as my greatest potential offering in this time.

Finally, the flowers are a reference to fertility and the power of creativity and the need for beauty (how Venusian!).

But the most prominent flower is the bright red poppy between my legs. According to an old postcard from the Victorian era titled “The Language of Flowers,” the meaning of the poppy is: “I am not free.”

In the context of the time this postcard was printed, “I am not free” probably meant “free for a date with a suitor.” But when I read it in today’s context of dwindling bodily freedoms, “I am not free” takes on a different significance. Hence its position directly below my uterus panties.

Thanks for coming along for this Venus retrograde ride! I look forward to reviewing our activism of the past eight years and beyond with you throughout the next few weeks. If I can keep myself on top of it, you can expect these essays on Fridays — Venus’s day — through April 11, just before the Venus retrograde concludes on April 12.