On Thursday night one of my city’s most beloved queer-owned businesses, The Little Gay Shop, and our foremost feminist empowerment organization, Future Front Texas, organized a space of community care for those reeling from Tuesday’s election results.
Speaker after speaker waited to grab the open mic and share an offering with those gathered — poems, organizing strategies, stories of resilience, book club invitations (that one was me — sign up to join The Civic Mystics if you want to read Emergent Strategy with us!).
Love was the core essence of the hastily organized gathering in a bare parking lot on a busy street corner near downtown Austin Thursday night, where queer and trans and Muslim and Black and femme and disabled and Latina and every kind of Texan who’s been made to feel “other” by our state leaders witnessed one another’s fear and vulnerability and resolve and hope and tenderness and generosity as we face down another Trump presidency.
After the 2016 election, I felt an urge to ready myself for battle; I remember feeling like I needed to start lifting weights or take up kickboxing to become physically strong enough to fight my way through a Trump presidency.
But after the 2024 election, I don’t feel full of fight.
This time I feel full of love.
If you aren’t already familiar with my work, I am the founder of Democrasexy, a “pleasure activism” organization guided by adrienne maree brown’s assertion that the pursuit of justice and liberation can be the most pleasurable human experience.
Born in 2021 in the aftermath of the Texas abortion ban (the most extreme in the nation at the time, well before Roe was overturned), Democrasexy has been bringing joy, togetherness, love, and hope to the moments of collective horror we’ve experienced in Texas for the past three years.
Tuesday night was certainly one of the most horror-filled moments since then, but it was also one of the greatest moments I’ve ever experienced.
Let me explain.
In partnership with the Working Families Party, Pop Girl Politics, and Waking Giants, Democrasexy organized an election night party unlike any other.
Democrasexy’s Election Spectacle Hope Watch / Doom Watch and Carnival of Care was a circus-themed space of delight, humor, community, queerness, depth, silliness, warm fuzzies (literally… we had a petting zoo), and — above all — love and joy. (Read more about it here.)
At the party, the Weird City Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence set up a bake sale to raise funds for socks and blankets for the unhoused in Austin, and afterwards they sent me this message:
Three days later, I heard from one of the clown burlesque performers about how the magic of our election night event was still powering them. Even amidst the cold, fearful feelings of what a Trump presidency will mean for those of us in the crosshairs of far-right politicians, the warmth of the community we gathered and the joy we created together that night is STILL giving us emotional sustenance that no one can ever take from us.
By making activism irresistible, Democrasexy has been joyfully building power here in Texas for the past three years under exactly the kind of right-wing extremism that America has chosen for itself for the next four years.
As much as I wish things were different, I know in my bones Democrasexy was made for this moment.
Will you consider joining the Democrasexy Founders Circle and donating to help us grow?
Will you consider asking your friends to donate?
Do you know of any organizations or foundations or wealthy individuals that would be willing to fund our work?
Our $125,000 crowdfunding campaign will get us set up for Q1 of 2025, but ultimately we are trying to raise $500,000 for next year to help us staff up, establish legal and organizational infrastructure, further develop our strategy in collaboration with other movement organizations, and build out our programs.
However you can support Democrasexy’s growth is deeply appreciated. We are building something powerful and enduring using the only strategies I still believe in — love and JOY.
(Here’s the video I recorded when I got home from the election night party we threw, before I got in the bathtub and cried my clown tears off with actual tears.)
If you are in Austin, join us tomorrow (Sunday, November 10) at 4pm for Tex Support, a meet-up facilitated by myself and Max, a skilled therapist and owner of Prism Integrated Health, and hosted by OutWellness. It’s a space of support for Texans who are struggling with big feelings about Texas and America. But not only do we get in our feels — we craft, we snack, we move our bodies a little bit, we make new friends… and we walk away feeling lighter than when we came in.
(By the way, when you donate to Democrasexy, this is one of the many programs you will help us grow so we can empower more Texans in this moment, at no cost to them.)
SO much love to y’all.
<3, Becky
(With gratitude to John Pavlovitz for the headline inspo)
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